How do I become a Leader in 15 minutes?

Saturday afternoon, my training at the national convention of AIESEC Belgium will be on the following topic:

Title:  “How to become a Leader in 15 minutes per day

Subtitle:  ‘Resolve challenges to grow yourself into a leader

Dr. Paul Koeck will show how investing 15 minutes per day in your personal and professional development as a leader will help you:

  • Resolve any type of stress
  • Focus on who you want to become (instead of focusing on day-to-day problems)
  • Discover your deepest dreams and realize them
  • Discover your personal talents and utilize them
  • Choose your right priorities in function of your goal

This workshop integrates elements of Stress Management with keys to successful Leadership because the path towards leadership starts with cleaning out what keeps you from progressing, resolving your issues, bottlenecks and stress. Once you master this skill, you will get a clearer insight in how you can grow as a leader and create your own vision to guide you towards discovering how you will use your existing talents better to reach your goal and fulfill your dream.

Preparation: for those who speak Dutch, we invite them to do the “online self scan” at and print the results and bring them to the workshop. We will discuss your score at the start of the seminar and explain you how you can use them to grow. There is no English translation of this test available yet, so the internationals can skip this test and still attend the workshop without any problem.

Trainer: Dr. Paul Koeck (

Paul Koeck studied medicines, philosophy and sports medicines in Leuven, management at the Vlerick School for management and was professionally trained as a Solution Focused Therapist, systemic coach and therapist and as a master in Ericksonian hypnosis. He trained leaders in most continents all over the world: USA, Argentina, India and most European countries and coached leaders in several Fortune top 500 firms. His concepts are teached at different universities over various continents. Further, he works as a physician and therapist in Antwerp and developed an online self-help program to offer online psychotherapy for participants who prefer to cure themselves without attending a therapist.

He authored four books on personal development, stress management and therapy who are available at

His websites are:

  1. Business & Leadership coaching at
  2. Online therapy at
  3. Personal blog at
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Bipolar Disorder: Can we cure Manic Depression? Bipolar Depression Treatment

Bipolar Disorder or Manic Depression differs from other forms of depression. In contrast to other forms of depression, there seems to be consensus in the medical world that bipolar depression is in the first place a disease, a biological condition that needs to be treated with medication, often with Lithium. Lithium contributes largely to stabilizing the disease, but has unfortunately lots of limitations. So the question remains: can psychotherapy cure bipolar depression?

Listen to someone who is diagnosed with Bipolar Depression. She wrote me this mail and asked me to share it with you through my blog:

“I am bipolar. This disease is from childhood. The story begins few hundred years ago. Once upon a time lived Mr. Andersen from Sweden. Every intelligent person knows, that there have been Swedish and Russians wars. Mr. Sigurd Andersen was solder. He was going to Russia with Swedish army trough Lithuania territory. And he met very beautiful Lithuanian woman. Fell in love and ran away from Swedish army. And he changed his name to Sigurdas A. (my grandfather is Sigurdas A.). He had bipolar. So, my disease came from those times.

Everyone knows writer Hans Christian Andersen…

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Depression cured: I love myself, I am my best friend

I just talked to a friend. I did not see her for a year and at that moment, she had a hard time, she felt down and depressed. So, I asked her: “Hi, how are you doing?” She answered: “Hey, I am ok :) … very good!”

Listen to our conversation:

– Feeling better than last year?

– Much more :) !

– How did you make that change?

– Just understood that I am the best friend of my own :) and I love myself and thought that I am the best. I love my life!

She teaches us a wise lesson: as long as we look for friends or others to make us happy, we will suffer because we are dependent on others. The day we understand that we are our own best friend to love, live becomes sunny again, and depression fades away from our lives and turns into satisfaction and happiness.

Sometimes we can help others to discover their love for themselves by giving them our love. But never can we expect others to give us love … because waiting to be loved, makes us dependent, scared, helpless and depressed.

When you hear a friend talking about love with an undertone of expecting to be loved, then we know he or she will suffer more before finding inner peace. When his or her speech changes into “I desire to give Love”, then you know that Love is coming soon. My clinical practice show this truth over and over again: if a patient starts to love and accept himself, then i know i will see him with a peaceful smile the next time he enters my consultation. If a patient starts to give love (without sacrificing the own needs), then cure is happening.

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The Alchemist: How Paulo Coelho escaped from Failure to Success, living his Legend!

Success comes often when you follow your true inner nature. “Live your legend” as Paulo Coelho writes in his bestseller “The Alchemist“. Paulo always felt he wanted to be a writer, but he did not do it … until he reached the age of 39.

At that point in his life he made a life changing Pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostella. That was the moment where he realized that he had two choices: either to do it, or to decide to accept that he would not be a writer. He decided to write and his first book became the story his Pilgrimage to Santiago. Then he decided to share his ideas in the form of a metaphor or story and he gave birth to “The Alchemist”.  This book did not become a success. Only when he published his third book, “Brida”, he decided to resubmit the Alchemist with a different publisher and it became a hit.

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How simple ideas can resolve stress, and how questions can help you discover those ideas.

He was sitting in my office: tense, tired, stressed and depressed. He lost pleasure in the small stuff of life. There were plenty of complex interpretations that could be the source of his depression. I wondered if I would dive into them, but decided not to. I decided to look for more simple solutions to break the vicious circle. How to find out? Asking questions, simple questions, often help. So i gave it a try …

– “When exactly do you feel most stressed? What happens at that specific moment?

– “Well, phone calls are happening all day long and I do feel overwhelmed and not prepared to answer”. (He works in the financial sector and get phone calls from anxious clients who are worried about their investments during this financial crisis.)

– “How many of the phone calls you receive are from this type of overstressed clients?”

– “About six of them”

– “Are those mostly the same six clients calling you?”

– “Yes!” , he replied.

– “Ok, and how many of them are really important clients that you cannot afford to lose?”

– “Two, and they call me almost every single day”.

– “How much time would it take you to study their file as your first job when you enter the office in order to prepare your answer to their questions?”

– “I guess about 5 minutes for each of them, that means 10 minutes all together”

– “Would it make a difference to you if you prepare as your very first job in the morning their file and call them yourself before they call you?” , was my next question.

He smiled and said “Yes, of course. I would feel much better. I would not be afraid to be overwhelmed by their calls any more!”

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Did Harvard Professor in Psychology B.F. Skinner invent Online Self Help Coaching?

The famous pschologist Burrhus Frederic Skinner, Professor of Psychology at Harvard University from 1958 till 1974, was probably the first to use machines to change human behavior. He was not only the ‘father’ of important concepts in psychology like ‘operant conditioning’, but he also the first to develop machines that are designed to shape and change human behavior and develop new habits.

He studied the laws of operant conditioning with his famous “Skinner box”. Later he developed his first ‘teaching machine’, long before internet and personal computers were invented. He proved that machines can help humans correct behavior and develop new habits. In the following video, you can see how skinner used his teaching machine to teach students in a school.

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Is European President Herman Van Rompuy a great Leader?

Read today the interview by Dominique Soenens at !

More Leadership video’s and interviews with CEO’s at and in future blog posts here.  A Dutch translation of this video is available on the Dutch pages of this blog.

Full Interview at

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Is Yves Leterme wel een goed leider?

Is Yves Leterme de geknipte man om België te leiden? Na Leterme I bestonden daar twijfels over, en bij het begin van Leterme II zijn die twijfels nog niet verdwenen. Business coach Paul Koeck van laat alvast zijn licht schijnen over de leiderschapskwaliteiten van Yves Leterme.

Lees het volledige interview van Vacature met Paul op

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How do I know if I am depressed?

My latest post on how to recognise a depression:

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Can Optimism prevent Depression?

Today I want  comment you briefly about the relationship between Optimism, Pessimism and Depression. Please, listen to this video:

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The Origin of Depression: Is it Genetic?

Some days ago, one team member asked me some interesting questions about the origin of Depression and its conclusions for its treatment with selfhelp or therapy. I wanna share this video with you:

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“Dream Your Life”: JCI Training in Arlon

Paul will give his new training “Dream your Life” in French language in Arlon, Belgium for the JCI Members at their annual Training forum “Les Assises” Wallonia on 8th May 2010 at 14.00 -17.00 hours. This training reflects the main exercices of Paul’s newest book “Leven (Z)onder Druk”. Be there if you speak French and want to develop yourself!

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Coachteam goes Facebook

Last week, one of our team members launched our Coachteam page on Facebook. Have a look, become a fan and give us feedback on what you wanna read on our Facebook Page at !

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Training Members of the Lithuanian Parliament in Vilnius

In October 2009, I trained members of Parliament and staff members in the Lithuanian Parliament. Feel free to have a look at a selection of this training in both languages:

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Our New blog @

Dear Friends, I am happy to tell you that we are launching our new blog at

What is the difference with my personal Blog?

1. reflects my personal ideas that might be related to my private life as well as to my greatest passion: my profession!
2. is developed by our team and reflects interesting information about the latest developments in the fields of selfhelp or psychology. They do not necessarily reflect our opinion but helps people follow what new insights and ideas are emerging on the markt of selfhelp.
3. is our business professional website where we anounce our new products. We will there soon anounce our new releaseof our online selfhelp service.

So I invite you to visit both of them on a regular basis!


there will soon be an interesting website at

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The Secret of Coaching yourself to successful Leadership Habits in 30 days!

Training at JCI Newport, California (USA): JCI Newport organizes a seminar Monday evening 14th December : “The Secret of Coaching yourself to successful Leadership & Personal Habits in 30 days!” by Dr. Paul Koeck, MD, IGread more »

JCI World Congress 2009

Dear Friends, last week, I was visiting the JCI World Congress 2009 in Hammamet, Tunesia with our Belgian Delegation. Looking forward to see you there! I hope to learn lot about Leadership, Coaching and Friendship. Some of you have asked me more about my JCI Training opportunities. You now can see for free a video recording of my latest Training “Strategic Leadership at the JCI Training Forum 2009 in Istanbul at . Paul Koeck, IG

New pictures have been posted at:

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Training @ Lithuanian Parliament

On Friday, I will give my training at the Lithuanian Parliament. You can also follow with live video streaming on the internet in English and Lithuanian translation:

„How can Leaders and Governments resolve unemployment with „Solution Focused Reactivation Strategies“?

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Teaching Schedule at Vilnius University

My actual teaching schedule:

  • Monday 26th: teaching the Masters in Organizational Psychology : “Solution Focused Business Coaching” (201 auditorium, faculty of philosophy)
  • Tuesday 27th: teaching the Masters in Clinical & Health psychology: “Solution Focused Cognitive Therapy” (201 auditorium, faculty of philosophy)
  • Tuesday 27th: teaching the Masters in Organizational Behavior: “Coaching & Leadership” (204 auditorium, faculty of communication)
  • Wednesday 28th: teaching in the course “Strategic information and knowledge management” (with prof. Zenona Atkociuniene): “Leadership in an International Context & Strategic Leadership” (203 auditorium, faculty of communication)
  • Thursday 29th October: Meeting at Belgian Embassy
  • Thursday  29th October: JCI Training for JCI Vilnius about “The Secret of Coaching yourself to successful Leadership & Personal Habits in 30 days!” ISM university (Arkliu street 18, Vilnius, see: )
  • Friday  30th October: Training Lithuanian Parliament: How can Leaders & Governements resolve unemployent with “Solution Focused Reactivation Strategies”?

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“The Secret of Coaching yourself to successful Leadership & Personal Habits in 30 days!” with JCI Vilnius

JCI Vilnius organizes a seminar with me on thursday evening 29th October at 18.30 – 22.30 hs: “The Secret of Coaching yourself to successful Leadership & Personal Habits in 30 days!”  by Dr. Paul Koeck, IG. (ISM university, Arkliu street 18, Vilnius). .

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The Secret of Gary Kasparov

Chess World Champion Gary kasparov came over to Belgium this week. He analyses his own success secrets. Since it connects very closely to my personal experience as a Business Coach of highly effective leaders, I wanted to summarize some key idea’s:

  1. Reflect on your ‘Decision Process’:
    1. analyze how you take decisions in your life: become counscious of how you took your succesfull decisions and make reflecting on your decisions a habit. This will lead to creating a personal decision style.
    2. success is the consequence of the quality of your decision processes, and long term success of the quality of your improvement process of making better decisions read more »

Solution Focused Coaching at Vilnius University

Vilnius University invited me to teach some classes in Solution Focused Coaching in their master program of organisational psychology and Solution Focused Therapy to the master students in clinical & health psychology together with some classes at the faculty of communication. It dates since 2004 that I visted Lithuania. I remember teaching my first workshop there about intercultural management in their parliament, only 5 days after the borders had been opened to EU countries. The Baltic states are active since they entered Europe. read more »

Interview by Dr. Joszef Telkes in Budapest

Last saturday, I was interviewed in Budapest by Hungary’s psychiatrist & celebrity, Dr. Joszef Telkes about our new online e-therapy business:

Internet Assisted Psychotherapy interview by Jozsef Telkes.

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JCI Budapest

Tonight I rejoin my friends at the European JCI Conference in Budapest in the Corinthia Hotel till saturday evening.  Looking forward to learning new insights and discovering old & new friends. If you are there, leave me a note at the reception so that we can meet.

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Marriage: Co-creating Lasting Love, an advice by Milton H. Erickson, MD

A discussion with a friend reminded me following transcript of a diaogue among two of my most important mentors. It reflects deeply my personal beliefs about Lasting Love:

In 1959, Jay Haley, the famous family therapist, asks his mentor, Milton H. Erickson, MD, the words most renowned hypnotherapist and psychiatrist: “If you were to describe what a good marriage is, how would you describe it?” Milton H. Erickson replies: When I describe a good marriage to my patients, I point out to them that there are essentailly four kinds of Love:

  1. The infantile type of love, “I love me.”
  2. The next stage, “I love the me in you. I love you becaue you are my brother, my mother, my father, my sister, my dog. The ‘me’ in ‘you’.
  3. Then the adolescent type of love, “I love you because your dancing pleases me, and because your beauty pleases me, and because your brains please me.”
  4. The adult stage of love wherein, I want to love you and cherish you because I want to see you happy, because i can find my happiness in your happiness. The happier you are, the happier, I’ll be. I’l find my happiness in yours. Il” find delight in your pleasure and intellectual persuits. I’ll find a delight in your enjoyment of dancing.” So the mature love is the capacity to find enjoyment in the enjoyment of the other person’s enjoyment. It works both ways. read more »

The pleasant Flow of Contributing

Today was a usual therapy day. Some other days, I am more into business coaching and building our new e-business. This morning, I felt peaceful, happy and calm. I know this feeling. It often occurs to me while working with clients. And my 10 o’clock client, mentioned the same: working with people makes him feel calm and good. Why is this so, I wondered?

  1. First, I remembered that I started to develop this pleasant feeling right after my first years of being a professional. Probably one needs to build ‘competence’ first, to feel selfconfident in what one is doing. So, if you read this and are still building competence in your profession, just accept that learning takes effort. And that there will be a day where you feel ok with what you do. Your customers will let you know when you do a good job and that will reinforce you.
  2. Second, this pure concentration on one person – no phone calls, no interruptions – gives our brain the time to tune in, the time to focus and as we know from litterature: focus is that what provokes “flow” in a human beings. Focussing relieves stress & tension and opens us up for joy. I remember from my philosophy classes the quote of Jean-Paul Sartre, in “L’Être et le Néant”, describing self-consciousness as  “Conscience de soi de quelque chose” (being aware of yourself through being aware of something).  Now, years later, I start to see that we become more ourself, indeed, when we focus on something else with dedication and concentration. read more »

Music into Harmony.

At the facutly of philosophy, Hannelore and I became friends. After dreaming away in the worlds of possibilities that philosophers create with words, we went for a drink in Café Erasmus, right in front of our faculty of philosophy (Hoger Instituut Wijsbegeerte) in Leuven. The second half of the day, or maybe night, we would change the word during our nightly meta-discussions. This year, we rediscovered eachother and she offered me her last CD recording – she does with music what I do with people: create a context for inner harmony.  That night, I returned home and discovered the harmony and peace that came over me while listening to her. So, instead of buying an exotic commercial relaxation CD, I would recomend you, my friends, to consider her latest CD: “Hannelore De Vaere – The Fellowship“. It Reminds me what reasearchers found out recently as one of the best cooping strategies for dealing with post traumatic stress: listen to your favorite music. It appeared to be more effective than most official “relaxation” techniques. Paul

Hannelore De Vaere:

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Another thing i loved as a child, were my piano lessons. When going to the University, i quit for a while, but some days, I will come back to my old passion. My Cousin made me discover an interesting book about piano teaching, written by a guy who analysed how his 2 daughters got piano teaching from Claude Debussy’s former personal assistant. Genius, has almost always been mentored by genius! Another interesting book is that of Karl Leimer, who summarised his method of teaching to his student Walter Gieseking in the Leimer-Gieseking Method.

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Financial Management

Dear friends, we are wondering what happens with our financial world. A wonderful source to learn for free more about Corporate Finance and Financial Valuation, are the free webcasts of University professor Damadoran. You can attend his full MBA teachings, with video, slides & templates on Corporate finance for free on his website: I attend his free seminars too. Join me. Paul

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Welcome on my new blog

paul-koeck-2009-terrasDear Friends,

I created this blog to keep you informed about things happening in my life and sharing my reflections with you. I will start writing you as soon as I find a free moment to do so.


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De Artsenkrant De Standaard De Morgen Feeling ATV TV Oost Het Laatste Nieuws Psyche En Brein